I had a revelation a couple nights ago while getting ready for bed: There are 10 years left.
Let me explain. . . . At lunch on Saturday our family sat in a downtown Lexington restaurant celebrating Mother's Day. It was the University of Kentucky's graduation day. A young man in cap and gown walked down the street. Back to the revelation - if she stays on track, and I completely expect she will, my youngest child, my sweet Allie, will graduate college in ten years. Thirty years after I graduated. Ten years and she'll walk the line, shake a hand, and soon after turn 22.
While ten years is a long time, a decade actually, I know it will go by quick. Allie recently pulled a dress out of my closet that I purchased ten years ago to wear on a cruise celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. The time since then has sped by. It's hard to believe.
So I have ten years left with Allie in our household. Considering four of those she'll most likely spend in a college dorm or apartment means six years. Six years to make sure she understands all the important bits and pieces of life. . . . how to do laundry, how to balance a checkbook, how to drive, that her self worth is not dependent on others opinions, that shopping at Goodwill is a better choice than Macy's and/or Ann Taylor, that one can lead a successful, well adjusted life without a Coach handbag, that "life is what you make it" (a quote from my mom) and when all else fails, singing "My Favorite Things" and half a bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips can get you through most bad days.
Most importantly, I hope she grasps that God loves her. Not because she never did drugs, was kind to animals, made excellent grades, never dated a felon, and kept gossip to a minimum. I hope she comprehends that God loves her - period. No performance needed. No grades, no beauty, no job, no accomplishment necessary. No prerequisites.
Gosh, I still struggle to believe it for me. So many females don't accept this. So many of us DO, but can't just BE. Be still, be grateful, be peaceful, be content. But I wish her an acceptance, a whole-hearted understanding that nothing, zero, nada, separates her from the love of God. The purity of a love that requires nothing. The perfection of a love that, even though we're undeserving, is lavished on us, is lavished on her. I hope in 2020 she believes that and lives that.